THE Lowly Peon

Yeah? Well the jerk store called, & they're running out of YOU! 
29 August 2010, 10:26am

A tale of the Chinese Jerk Store

tomorrow's my day to bring lunch, so I went to do some shopping after work. I buy my produce in the local market, akin to a farmers' market in the states (except more awesome, super cheap, and open all the time), but things like canned tuna require a trip to the supermarket, which I hate. it doesn't take a lot to put me in a foul mood in one of these places.

I quickly found my goods — a bottle or two of juice, tofu, and tuna — and got in line. being a Sunday afternoon, it was pretty packed. I waited maybe five minutes, until there was a good sized line behind me, when some woman walked up in front of me. we call these specimens three eights ("san ba", or 三八), because of women's day on march eighth. they are mean, nasty, and shake the ground a little when they walk. I gave her a dirty look, and though she knew my meaning, she put her stuff on the belt and began check out.

when it was my turn, she was still there, putting her stuff into bags. the clerk asked if I wanted bags, to which I responded "no need, thanks."

the san ba joked to the clerk "haha he can't understand you, he'll just say thank you to everything you say." the clerk defended me and said "well he just said 'no need,' so he can apparently say something." then I jumped in:

"yes, i know some chinese. maybe not as good as yours, but at least i know what 'queue' means!"

it was more beautiful than when ol' George costanza thought up the jerk store comeback.